I Done Bought Me a House!

Now, don't judge a book by its cover. Slap a fresh coat of paint on that sucker and we're good to go! The interior is just a matter of clearing out the pigeon shit and the possum babies, though we're thinking we might just adopt them for pets. Would keep the coon dogs good and exercised, and they're getting a little draggy with all this city living, if you know what I'm saying.

The kitchen has indoor plumbing, y'all! We just need to buy some pipes cause the scavengers already been through here for all the copper in the place. T'ain't no snakes in the tolet (it is an outhouse, y'all! So cute with that little crescent moon and everything! It's like my own little house, behind the big house!), I know cause I just dangled one of them possum babies down there to check and nothing came raring up. So I'll pee easier tonight. I've named the spiders Octopussy, Heptopussy, Sextopussy (that's my favorite!), Quintopussy, Quartopussy, Triptopussy, Duopussy, and Monopussy. They've all got eight eyes and most of 'em got eight legs.

But the best thing about it is all we've got to do is hook the mobile home up to the tractor and tow it on out here! Moving's no trouble y'all, I don't know what all the bitching and moaning is about!

Come on down-- we got a guest room and everthang!

Good God, can my attention span GET any shorter?

Once considered (by me anyway) solely the provence of annoying teenage girls, Twitter has become the new... what? The new black? The new blog? The new me? You have 140 characters to say something clever, which believe me is a lot easier after drinking. Which is why I've taken to shots starting at 11 am, which is usually when I publish my first Twit, as I like to call it, of the day. (The technical term is "Tweet" but I think A- this is because they realized that 'Twit' made them all sound like idiots and B- they decided saying it with a French accent would make it sound less moronic. Which is usually true.)

Anyway, regular readers (hello.. hello...hello...) will notice that I have a new! Twitter feed bar to the right of this intensely brilliant post. Until this post goes further down the page. In which case it will be to the right of the next intensely! brilliant! post. You can also sign up for my twitter feed at www.twitter.com/katiefar. You can even sign up for my updates to get sent as text messages to your cell phone if you join. And then it will be like I'm stalking you, only funnier. Although, I can be a funny stalker. Really. People could tell you stories.